The Unlearned Self


I feel as though I have unlearned who I am, as opposed to moving closer to the notion of “finding one’s self.”  I fear this is no accident.  I know I am not the only one, nor am I part of a small, minority group that feels this sort of way.  I could be wrong, but this is just the idea that I get through living and experience.

I am not talking about memorizing facts and figures in school, I am talking about something much, much more important.  What does is mean to “get an education” these days anyway?  And even of those who earn a degree – what does it even mean  for them?  Anything more than just a fancy piece of paper with a few signatures?

It seems to me society has made a wrong turn, a few of them to be modest, and the education system is definitely one of them.  For, what good is learning, quite frankly anything, if you do not even know yourself?

Think about that, I mean sure, you can learn to put out analyze financial markets or construct spreadsheets but who really cares about any of that?  What, deep down inside, part of you gives a damn about the latest financial prediction or the newest feature of Excel to maximize effectiveness of number crunching?  I sure don’t.

Don’t get me wrong, there is some sense of satisfaction in doing these things, but I think this is unnatural satisfaction.  For, what part of number crunching finances appeals to the Self?  None as far as I am concerned.

This brings me to the larger problem of post-education where people get jobs they tend not to like very much or at least not for very long.

Honestly, why do people do this to themselves?

The answer seems to be because they were told to, by their parents, teachers, peers and even just society at large.  But why not tell these people to, excuse my French, fuck off?!?

Think about it, a world where peoples lives are not wasted by slaving away for some stupid paycheck that barely covers living expenses initially, or goes into some sort of investment to yield more money for another savings scheme.  When does this cycle stop?  Or maybe more importantly, why do so many people let it begin, maintain the cycle and re-cycle until they die?

Back to the Self though, do we not toil away at our own expense to forget who we really are?  Are we really growing in living, or are we shrinking and dying?  These answers are not easily assembled if you really think about it – at least not for me.  You must separate illusion from reality, and think for yourself.  Do you know your Self any better now, right here, today, than you did yesterday, last week, last year?

Best,

-Paul

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3 thoughts on “The Unlearned Self”

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